Dogpaddling to Nowhere

Hi everyone! It's been a heckuva few days since Wednesday. I've been helping students and trying to catch up on some accounting work for a client. Sadly, I've not done much writing.  But I'm still working on my planning, which is the only goal I think I put up for this round of ROW80.

One of the things I've been trying to get done is migrating Fiendish Serendipity from Blogger to Wordpress. I just can't figure out a way to do it.

Any input would be welcome!

I hope to have more to report on Wednesday.

Until then, happy creating...

I Forgot the Fun!

Before I wander into the forest of my own blog, I take time to appreciate others who have gone before me. Today, that was the best thing I could have done.

After reading AmyBeth Inverness's offering, my eyes were caught by her "SyFy Question of the Day." Being a huge fan, I took another detour.

Wow! Now, keep in mind I did this at work. In a math class. With lots of students. Lots of suppressed chuckles and snorts coming from my desk. Lots of amazed glances coming from my students, who were just trying to get their work done in peace.

Oops. Sorry, all.

I'm posting a link here for everyone to enjoy. And, if you're at work, spread the love. If it's allowable, of course.

http://amybethinverness.com/2013/05/31/scifi-question-of-the-day-your-lightsaber-is-actually-a-sonic-screwdriver/

This reminds me that I'm free to have fun with my work. Indeed, for it to be successful, I've got to have fun with it.

A big shout-out to you, AmyBeth, for reminding me that this is a joy as well as a job.

See you all Sunday!

I Took Advice!

Normally, I'm as stubborn as a box of rocks. Advice? Not generally. And not only am I as stubborn as a box of rocks, I think my head's made of up rock, too. After all, I can pound it against a problem for it feels like forever, and not see any progress. Yet, I'll keep going at it.

Isn't the definition of stupid the act of doing the same thing, but expecting different results?

So...I decided to do something different. I listened to all the great advice that came to me after my Sunday Lament.

You know what? It worked. I walked away from my problem child WIP until yesterday afternoon. All of a sudden, while I was doing something else entirely, the problems were fixed in a cascade of information that just tumbled into my brain. It was amazing.

For anyone out there that's had a spinal adjustment, it felt just like all the vertebrae in my spine rippling into place. (That makes me giggle uncontrollably, but my osteopath says that's a normal reaction. Not crazy. Whew!)

So, I want to shout out a big "THANK YOU!" to everyone that helped me, especially Bear, because, like any good bear, he's always got warm and fuzzy hugs when you need them most and he gave good meditation advice. Irene and Elizabeth, I would have thought I was crazy, walking away from a problem until you two urged me to do it.

I feel like this was a real group effort.

We Did It!!!

My Brain Hurts!

Actually, it doesn't hurt - it feels like an electrified ball of barbed wire. How's that for an image?

I'm not in pain, but I've been dissecting my WIP so much, twisting bits here and there, that I'm completely lost. I have no idea what I'm doing with my story right now.

Quite frankly, I'm in a moderate state of panic.

Has anyone else been in this situation? Do you have any advice for me?

I've not been able to write a word, and I can't see my way clear.

Aaaarrrggghhhh....

Laugh Out Loud Funny!

My writing partner Olivia decided to gift me with an email attachment of Daffy Duck. What she DIDN'T know about was all the other cute bits attached to it.

Now, Daffy and I have never been more than polite acquaintences; I always got on better with Bugs and Marvin. But this...this you have to see for yourself...


Sorry I couldn't get that to align properly or get it up higher. I've never inserted a picture into a blog post before. But I thought this was absolutely gut-busting funny.

The most amusing part is that it really applies to a character of mine, although I haven't really brought that out in her. Time to make a few personality cuts and let the psycho dribble!

See everyone on Sunday!

Flesh and Heat Don't Go Together

It's harder having an epiphany before you wake up. At least, before you wake up and have caffeine. I discovered this yesterday, the hard way.

Some background is necessary here. It's pretty evident that I like coffee. So does one of my roommates. We have a 12 cup coffee pot. It was an ancient beast, and it finally decided to die. I gave it a decent and heartfelt burial.

About 7 years ago I had yet to be hooked on that lovely little bean. My dad came down for my college graduation. He loves coffee too, so I rushed out to get a little 4 cup pot just for him. It was one of the things I took with me when I got divorced. Jon didn't drink coffee.

So, since the big one crapped out, I dragged the little one out for emergency purposes. Freshly ground beans - the fragrance of a good morning.

Yeah, right.

In my eagerness to pour this lovely little elixir of life, I pulled out the carafe at an angle. Now, it's a small pot, right? It doesn't weigh very much. Neither does the actual machine. Consequently, the whole damn thing started to move.

Naturally, I decided to hold it down to keep it steady. Not a good idea. Because I didn't grab the plastic with my fingertips. No, not me. Why would I do anything smart?

I grabbed the hot plate with my fingertips. Every single one on my left hand. Just before I had to go teach my first Saturday class this semester.

Ouch isn't the word. I sat for half an hour with my fingertips in a glass of ice. It's not the way I thought I'd wake up yesterday.

But just think what a great scene it will make for something!

Between fixing computers and my shift linkage breaking, I haven't done any writing for the past few days. But sitting here, watching Iron Man, I think I'm going to shake things up by blowing up something. Should be fun.

I'll let you know on Wednesday.

Happy writing, all!

The Innate Viciousness of Inanimate Objects

Yeah, the title pretty much says it all.

Now, you all remember what was happening with my computer a couple of days ago, right? (Interject here: "But wait, there's more!") While I was working with my writing partner at Starbucks yesterday, iTunes started to grey out my songs. You know, where they put an exclamation point inside a circle and it says you don't have access because it can't find the song. Yeah. That one. Randomly and not all at once.

And I have playlists that go along with different things/major characters for the book I'm working on. Grrr.

Guess what I can't access right now?

The only good news is that once I delete a song (if it's a purchased song through iTunes) I can download it again from the cloud. Then it becomes operative again. Usually. I think there was one last night that failed.

Anyway...

So, I pack up my stuff and run home to try to fix said computer. This was around 1:30. First, I ran a malware program. Didn't find a thing. Then I ran AVG Free edition. Found the usual complement of cookie stuff, and those were fixed/quarantined. Then I ran an iTunes diagnostic. This didn't end until around 9:00 last night, as the AVG portion was still scanning when I went to go do some accounting work until 8:00.

The major bummer about this entire thing is not the time it would take to delete and reload from the cloud. Nope. The problem is the stuff that I uploaded from CDs - CDs I no longer can find.

I really need my John Cafferty and the Beaver Brown Band stuff, because that music is really tied in to a particular character for Immortal Blood. I may have to  open up my very thin metaphorical wallet and spend some more almost nonexistent money.

There's the best reason I've thought of so far today for NOT getting a venti, skinny caramel latte.

How's your day going?

Cinco de Mayo

Yup, here it is the 5th of May, so I'm kicking it in with mariachi music in the background. It's also my very sweet ex-sister-in-law's birthday. Happy birthday, Tracey!

My computer's been redlining for the past couple of weeks, so I've been doing some backups and deletions over the past couple of days. I'm down to 41 gigs free, but that's still not enough room. In the process, though, I've found some book notes that I thought I'd lost, so I've spent the past few days incorporating them into Immortal Blood. It's been fun. The dialogue still strikes me as good after getting some distance. I also found a scene were a shapeshifting wolf tries to convince a mundane that she's real while explaining about "real" furry conventions.

It made me chuckle, and gave me some impetus for the next few days. I love having a direction.

Right now, though, my direction's heading out to the kitchen to make some pico de gallo for tonight.

Hasta Miercoles (I think that means Wednesday...) Regardless, everyone have a great time with the parties tonight!

X - Xenophobia

To be xenophobic means to be afraid of foreigners. I got cold chills when I remembered this word.

It got me thinking about the history of the United States. Growing up, I'd always heard that we thought of ourselves as a country made up of a "melting pot" of all different kinds of people and nationalities. It's a lovely thought, but I don't think that's how it's worked out, really.

We've had a history of discriminating against various nationalities of people throughout our history. The Irish, the Italians, the Germans, the Japanese. And we can't ever forget the First Peoples.

Given the events of 9/11, and now the Boston Marathon, I can't help but wonder if our collective xenophobia is going to be ratcheted up again, this time against people from the Middle East.

I sincerely hope not. Some of the most consistently kind people I know are from that area.

We have to keep remembering that every group, from every part of the world, has a few bad apples. We have to remember not to color everyone with the same crayon.

Let's all keep clear heads.

W - The Most Powerful Letter in the Alphabet

The title sounds a bit boastful, doesn't it? How can a rather nondescript letter like "W" be so powerful?

It's simple. Like everything, it's more powerful when it works in a synergistic relationship with others. Most importantly, in the phrase "What If...?"

The possibilities that phrase opens up are limitless. Literally. What would you do if you could do anything you wanted? Anything at all you could imagine?

See what I mean? The letter "W" is the beginning of a transformation. A transformation of life, circumstances, health, world...you name it. Anywhere, everywhere, anything, everything.

All we have to do is say, "What if...."

C'mon. Say it with me. What kind of glorious world can we imagine together...?

U - Unflattering

I did a very bad thing. I looked out of a window. Not just once, but multiple times. That was a big mistake.

Let me start at the beginning. This week is finals week at the college where I work, so I've been proctoring exams since Monday. Boring, but necessary.

Now, one of the rooms where the math classes take their computerized final has three walls that are floor-to-ceiling glass. This glass faces the woods at the back of our campus. This is another bad thing.

It's nesting season here in Central Florida, which means it's also mating season. And we've got some territorial birds, some of which are very, VERY, big.

Take turkey vultures for example. They're big, black birds who do a marvelous job cleaning up road kill. They have an important purpose in the larger scheme of things. But not when it comes to math finals.

The previously mentioned windows have a peculiar shape to them. They throw off reflections extremely well. So much so that the vultures (and a red-headed woodpecker) attack the windows. They see their own reflections and think another bird is encroaching on their territory. First line of defense - attack.

This is unnerving to the students on the other side of the glass. So, I decided to walk over to them and see if my presence got them to go away. No such luck.

The luck wasn't with me personally, either. I caught a glimpse of myself in the window. Wow. This is not a good thing. I have an a$$. And it's a helluva revelation. Not a good one. Now, I've always been told I have a nice a$$. Since I don't have eyes in the back of my head, I have to trust others' opinions.

The reflection was the worst thing I've ever seen. But it didn't stop there. Oh, no. Today, in the same room, in the same place - I caught another reflection. But it was for the front. Again, terrible.

My diet changes, as of tomorrow morning. I'm going vegetarian. Vegan if I can stand it. I've got to ditch the "unflattering" and maybe come up with something better.

Here's hoping!

So Much T, So Little Time

There's lots of words I like that begin with T - like "twit", "truculent", and yes, "time."

When people really piss me off, I usually call them ignominious twits. Most people have no idea what that means, so they don't know they're being insulted. (Gosh, in print, that sounds terribly mean. I think I might have to modify my behavior.)

"Truculent" was suggested by my roommate. Probably because he generally is. And he prefers it that way.

"Time" is probably my favorite, though.

I have a theory about time - I think it's subjective. I know from experience it doesn't flow smoothly. For instance, when I flipped my car down a ravine during a snowstorm, all the stuff flying across my car went in slow motion. I just said, "Aw, shit" as the car started to tumble. The flipping was quick, but the stuff rolling around in the car went super slowly.

I also think we experience it in a linear fashion because we have a linear nervous system. Think about it for just a moment - nerve impulses jump from synapse to synapse, really quickly, sure, but in a domino-like progression. There is no other way we could experience time. At least, I'm not sure we could. I'm not sure our minds could make sense of impressions that didn't seem to have any kind of logical, predictable order.

What do you think?

See you tomorrow!

"R" - Raptor

Raptor. Even the word is cool. Just the sound of it sends shivers down the spine, even if the meaning is unclear.

Debates about evolution v. creation aside, these are creatures that HUNT. Owls are raptors. Hawks, ospreys, eagles - they're all raptors. Those beaks and claws can rip into things like nothing else. But the most dramatic representation of raptors came in the film "Jurassic Park."

Remember the velociraptor in the beginning, when Sam Neill described to the obnoxious child exactly how the velociraptors behaved? It sounded creepy even then.

But later in the film, when they got loose and started hunting the people, the creep factor escalated exponentially.

I have a theory about why so many people were fascinated by them - and to some extent, still are. I think it's because mammals were prey animals. Maybe it's still coded somewhere in our DNA to be fearful of things that can rip us to bits and start eating us while we're still alive.

Either way, it works well for authors and filmmakers. It'll be interesting to see how well Jurassic Park does now that it's come out again on the big screen in 3-D.

See you tomorrow!

"Q" - Quiet

Quiet, blessed quiet. How I need thee.

I guess it's evident I'm an introvert. The only way I can recharge my batteries is through some alone time that's also quiet time. And, oh, it feels so, so good.

When I was living in Michigan, I used to love to lay out in a meadow, flat on my back, and take strength from the earth. All my stress just melted away. And it was all because of quiet.

It doesn't seem in today's modern society that most people, the younger ones especially, appreciate the value of silence. That's unfortunate.

I wonder if they're afraid - maybe afraid of being alone, of having to actually take time to ponder things if their senses aren't being bombarded by something outside of themselves.

But the silence really isn't. If you unplug, you can hear lots of things. The wind, the rustle of trees and grasses, birds, insects; really, too many things to list. It's music you don't have to purchase, pirate, or download.

Try taking a media fast. No television, music, podcasts, or computers in any form - except what you need to do to work. Take some time and open a book. A real one. With pages. Sorry, no Kindles or Nooks or eReaders of any type. If you're concerned about missing your weekly episodes of Survivor, that's what Tivo's and DVRs are for.

It's thoroughly relaxing too, in the short term. Take a break.

You've earned it.

"P" - Potato

The humble potato. A prolific tuber that no one would eat for the longest time. At least, not in Europe.

But potatoes have addictive qualities. I know, because I'm addicted to them. It's part cultural, part genetic. A great deal of my heritage is Irish. Growing up, my uncle and I used to have mashed potato races. (Wow, that just made me laugh out loud. That was probably my introduction to competitive eating!) Uncle Ron always won. I was a kid - I was okay with him winning. But the potatoes were always marvelous, with lots of butter, cream, salt and pepper.

But potatoes change and mutate as people grow up. As little children, we like mashed potatoes. We like the way it felt in our mouths. During holidays we enjoyed making little wells in our potatoes to hold our gravy.

As teenagers we headed toward the crunchy aspects of potatoes. Chips were great. We had them everywhere. They were especially useful during crises and stress, when their crunch was just something we needed that helped comfort us. And french fries...things to crunch on, nibble on, and even to gesture with as an extension of our fingers during particularly vocal and vociferous meals. They're also really good for surreptitiously starting food fights.

With adulthood comes the gourmet aspects of potatoes - roasting them with garlic, olive oil, fresh rosemary, and a bit of sea salt and freshly cracked pepper. On the Fourth of July you can show you patriotism making potato salad with blue (okay, purple) Peruvian potatoes. Great texture and flavor, and they hold up in salad form.

I guess it's evident I like them.

Lots of other people do, too. Americans list potatoes as their number one vegetable. (We won't tell them that it's really a starch.)

Have a great day!

"O" - Obstinate

That's me. In spades. Stubborn as a box of rocks. I've always been that way, too.

From the time I could talk, my favorite word was "why." It drove my parents crazy. And then, if I felt they didn't give me a complete answer, or if their answer led to something else, I kept hammering away at it.

This was probably my earliest manifestation of the disease commonly called "insatiable curiosity." I've pretty much got a terminal case -- which is a really good thing.

Writers need to be inveterate snoops. In any and all directions. The more the better, for your plot, your characters, and your conflict.

So be obstinate. Don't worry about the negative connotations. We know it's a good thing. Snoop, spy, watch, analyze and pick things apart to your heart's content, all you creative people out there!

Your stories will improve, your fan base will grow, and your satisfaction level will go through the roof.

Now that I've got my first coffee in my hand, I'm going off to do some creating of my own.

Have a productive day!

"N" - Narcomancy

I came across this really cute word today. But when I found the definition, I thought it was way cooler than I thought.

Narcomancy is the ability to practice divination during sleep. Tons of really great story ideas and characters started churning in my head.

Is there a way to legislate against it? Or is there a way to prevent it? And if you try to keep a narcomancer (new cool word) from sleeping so that he/she can't access that incredible talent, what happens then?

Humans have a disturbing tendency to fall into psychotic breaks without enough sleep that includes good REM sleep. It's when the brain relaxes, slows down and processes things. Some of those breaks never heal.

A fresh psychotic who can predict things. What a tool. Could be used for counter-intelligence.

Wow. I need to get back to my fiction now.

See y'all tomorrow!

"M" - Mouth

Now, I know what you're wondering - what in the world can be said about your mouth? Haven't we talked about it all - stuffing feet into it, stuffing chips into it, swilling liquor into it...what more can there be?

Something that will knock your socks off.

I was driving to Cocoa Beach last weekend for a board of directors meeting, and as I drove I was listening to National Public Radio. I'd flipped on the radio in the middle of an interview with Mary Roach.

In case you aren't familiar with her work, she's a science writer who penned a great book called "Stiffs" about what happens to people after they die. Fascinating, well-written, and even a bit comedic in spots (if I remember right).

She has a new book out called "Gulp." It's about what happens to food, from beginning to end, so to speak. But in the interview plugging the new book, I learned something amazing.

We have two sets of nostrils.

Yup. One external, one internal. The second set lets you taste your food more than once. Apparently if you're eating, and your mouth is closed (hopefully!), and you breathe out through your nose, you'll be able to  smell all the original goodness of what you're eating.

In the name of scientific inquiry, I had to try it. It worked. Very well.

And it made me giggle.

Try it. It's kinda neat. Who knew?

"L" - Luscious

One of the guys I work with, Peter, made a comment before my first math class walked in today. Someone commented on his beard, and they called it "luscious."

Wow, there's a great word. It has its own mouth-feel, like forbidden, decadent food that's high in fat, calories, and satisfaction.

I imagine Rubens though of his models this way - an abundance, a plethora of attractive, enticing flesh that he shared with the rest of the world.

Guys can be luscious too...as evidenced by the popularity of male models with oiled-up bodies.

"Luscious" appears in our lives in lots of different ways, and we get to indulge our senses in all of them.

Lucky us! (Oh, look, another "L" word!)

Sorry!!!

I don't have anything to report. I think I've written maybe a thousand words, but I've gotten really caught up in accounting work before the 15th.

I probably won't be able to check in until after that. In fact, I've got to dash out right now to do some more work tonight.

See you after tax season!